ANN ARBOR, Mich. (WXYZ) - Why do men and women live together before marriage? Does she want to find out if he will really pick up his socks? Does he want to see how much tv watching and video game playing he can get away with?
Well, a new study by the University of Michigan says men and women who cohabitate before tying the knot, have very different views on the subject.
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The University of Michigan research found that women volunteered "love" as a reason to live together three times as often as men did, while men cited "sex" as a reason to live together four times as often as women did.
"Men and women expressed very different expectations for cohabiting relationships," said Pamela Smock, a sociologist who directs the University of Michigan Population Studies Center, part of the U-M Institute for Social Research (ISR).
"We found that responses varied by gender much more than they did by race or ethnicity, suggesting a substantial gender gap in the perceived role of cohabitation in the union formation process," she said.
Researchers examined 192 young people in their late twenties. Approximately half the participants were men, half were women, and there were approximately equal numbers of white, Black, and Hispanic participants.
Topics included positive and negative aspects of cohabitation, reasons couples might decide to move in together rather than date or marry, reasons not to cohabit, and the kinds of changes that might occur when a couple first moves in together.
Men and women gave three key reasons for their decisions to be "roommates: wanting to spend more time with a partner, hoping to share life's financial burdens, and desiring to test compatibility.
But the way men and women talked about these three broad reasons was very different.
Both men and women saw cohabitation as a temporary state in which to gauge compatibility, but major gender differences emerged in the underlying goals of living together.
Women saw it as a transitional arrangement preceding marriage, while men tended to see it as a convenient, low-risk way to see if a relationship had longer-term potential, using terms like "test drive" to describe the arrangement.
But the strongest gender differences emerged in the perceived disadvantages of cohabitation. Women believed that living together meant less commitment and legitimacy than marriage, while men saw the greatest disadvantage as a limitation on their freedom.
Despite the gender mismatches in motives and expectations, Smock notes that young adults appear to see cohabitation as an expected part of life. "Ultimately, the clearest message was that living together is very much taken for granted. As a result, the upward climb in the proportion of young adults who cohabit is likely to continue for some time," she said.
Smock conducted the study with Penelope Huang of the University of California Hastings College of the Law, Wendy Manning of Bowling Green State University, and Cara Bergstrom-Lynch of East Connecticut State University. The research was supported by grants from the Eunice Kennedy Shriver National Institute of Child Health and Human Development.
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